WHEN YOUR PARENTS APPEAR WICKED
As children, our parents sometimes appear to be wicked and mean to us that we even wonder if they mean good to us or if they are our parents.
We usually feel this way when they set boundaries for us and give us strict rules that keep us from doing everything we want to do.
The big question is: are they truly wicked by being strict and setting boundaries on our actions and desires? No! At least, I don’t think they are being wicked.
As a matter of fact, I believe they are being nice and loving as parents to their children when they set such boundaries. Believe me, they are showing you love by those godly boundaries they set for you.
when your parents appear wicked by giving you strict rules, they are actually being loving. My friend, obey their strict rules; you will be most certainly glad you did. It may not be convenient for you or limit your enjoyment, but you are sure it will keep you from having the fun that your peers are having. However, when you grow up, you will look back and see how good they have been to you.
Listen, let me tell you something. As a child, you hardly know what is good or evil. All you know is what you want to do, but you don’t know its consequences. But, your parents usually know what you want to do and their consequences. That’s why they give you strict rules that will keep you from doing what you want and get ruined eventually.
So, when your parents appear wicked by giving you strict rules, they are actually being loving. My friend, obey their strict rules; you will be most certainly glad you did. It may not be convenient for you or limit your enjoyment, but you are sure it will keep you from having the fun that your peers are having. However, when you grow up, you will look back and see how good they have been to you.
As a little boy, my parents stick instructions on the use of my pocket money has been paying off. He may not like to hear this, but my parents hardly gave me enough money to meet my needs as a little boy in a boarding house. It was near hell for me, but I couldn’t complain nor steal. God granted me wisdom for survival then. That wisdom enabled me have surplus to buy books and relevant gadgets on campus. Now, I can survive almost on anything as an adult and even when I get plenty, I put it to maximum use.
Also, I was made to read and not play away my time as a little boy. My father compelled to read and not go hanging out. When he comes back in the evening and see my leg dirty as a result of football playing, he flogged me on my legs. That may not be the best, but that upbringing has instilled in me the ability to sit down and study at length and discretion in socializing.
My friend, when your parents appear wicked because of their strict instructions and discipline, they are not being wicked, they are actually being loving and you should be grateful to them.
Now, let’s assume they are actually being wicked to you (for any reason whatsoever) in the guise of discipline you, endure it, it will make you a better person. Don’t allow it to distract you. It will make you stronger.
I know many people who will lie and almost fight their parents because the training in the discipline they were getting. Many of them are not enjoying now. They are regretting it. They were the big boys then, but not now. They had all the fun, but life is not funny to them now. Do you want to be like them? Please be wise.
I like to end by telling you a story. Agatha Amata is an outstanding broadcaster and entrepreneur who had strict parents as a child. Her strict parents made life ‘uncomfortable’ for her, but today, she looks back to confess that it’s those strict rules that have made her the person she is today.
Now, hear her story:
My mother was extremely strict. I lost my father pretty early. I think I was in form two and I was very close to my dad so it was a bit difficult…. My mum was absolutely wonderful and she was so strict, I used to wonder if she was my mum. All the things that my friends could do, I couldn’t do but I thank her for it now because she instilled a lot of discipline in us as kids. It doesn’t matter if you are a boy or a girl, you must cook. I mean, all the boys in my house can cook! As girls my mother will say to us ‘you do not sleep when the sun is out’ so we had to wake up at 4a.m everyday whether you have something to do or not. Now, as a matter of routine, between 4 and 5a.m, my eyes must open. It doesn’t matter what time I sleep even if I sleep by 3, when it’s between 4 and 5a.m, I must wakeup. I could go back to sleep later though. It is in-born now. I don’t need an alarm clock again. Once I open my eyes, I know the time would be between 4 and 5a.m. She didn’t allow us to go to parties. That one was not good, even till now I don’t think that was good. In University, my mum used to check on me. But I thank her. I realized what she went through now that I am older and the sacrifices she had to make to train seven children the way she did. Then I used to cry and say ‘No, this woman cannot be my mum. how can she be so mean’ and all that. But I realize now that it is that upbringing that has helped me today to be who I am.”
It’s normal to see your parents’ effort is to instill discipline in you as wickedness. But know that they are helping you become great. They are trying to ensure you don’t grow up and become a beggar or even a thief. They want to make sure you have greater wealth, better family and less regrets. Enjoy the training of your parents; it’s not wickedness.