COPING WITH BACK STABBERS AT WORK
You meet different characters at work. If don’t know how to relate with their different characters, you may fail in your work. Discover different characters and how to cope with them. Today, we are looking at back stabbers.
Some weeks ago, I started a series of discussion on WorkPlace Matters entitled, Coping With Characters At Work. In continuation on it, let’s look at how to cope with back stabbers.
Back stabbers are people who talk evil of you in your absence while pretending to be your friend. You are very likely to encounter people like this at work. But Like I said earlier, the right way to handle them is to find away y to handle them. Lols.
One of my confusions when I started encountering back stabbers is trying to figure out what they really want to achieve by stabbing their friends on the back. I found out that the motivation for many back stabbers is trying to gain favour from those that they are stabbing you before. They believe that by presenting you in bad light from those they want favour from will make them glitter as good persons. I also found that sometimes, they present you in bad light before your boss or colleague to build up hatred they already have against you.
Sometimes, these back stabbers who may be on the same level with you think that talking bad about you will push them forward to more opportunities and reduce your chance of moving forward.
Why am I even talking about why they do their back stabbing when our business today is how to cope with them?
Abeg let’s go down to the matter – how to cope with these back stabbers.
My #1 strategy is to ignore them. Yes, you have to! “Brojid is it that easy?” No! Not at all! But you have to. I understand that you think that their back stabbing is affecting your personal brand, especially before people. I also understand that you wish not to be misunderstood. I also understand that being wrongly represented can affect your relationship with others.
But this is why I had to convince myself to ignore them: My life, wealth, promotion and honour is not dependent on any human being. God is completely in control of my life. In fact, I live my life with the consciousness that my life is about God and I. That’s how I know that nobody’s back stabbing can really deny me of all that God has packaged for me. I believe very strongly that my promotion does not come from my CEO but God. God is Judge and He brings down one person to lift up another. My promotion and prosperity is therefore not dependent on any back stabber but on God. In fact, let me tell you what will happen to you. If you look up to God for your promotion, He will elevate you and make your enemies like you.
Here is something I learnt from Joseph the dreamer. He also had a kind of back stabber – Mrs Protifer who went around saying what is not true about him. It seems to have landed him onto trouble (prison) but it moved him to the next phase of his walk into greatness. See; don’t worry about your back stabbers. They can do nothing to stop you from that which God has destined for you.
I have been back stabbed a lot but that has not stopped by career progress or rise. When God decides that it’s time for my promotion, He makes arrangement for who will speak on my behalf. He makes arrangement to counter false reports against men before those in authority. That’s why you and I must not fight back stabbers. Just ignore them and face your work. They can’t do us jack!
Then, the second way of coping with them is to relate with caution. These back stabbers pretend to be your friend but they are not. Once you identify them, stop relating with them as friends. Don’t tell him your plans and secrets. Be careful the aspect of your life let him in.
Now if you are a back stabber, let me tell you something: if you continue in your lifestyle, you will realize that you have been working against yourself. For a minute, look at your lifestyle this way: you talk ill of someone who you pretend to be his friend before people who think you are his friend. What makes you think they don’t see you as an undependable person? Can they trust you for anything? No way!
I don’t like to tell stories here. But I have encountered someone who is a professional back stabber. Everybody in that workplace knows him as such and so treats him as one.
For me personally, I have been back stabbed a lot but that has not stopped by career progress or rise. When God decides that it’s time for my promotion, He makes an arrangement for who will speak on my behalf. He makes an arrangement to counter false reports against men before those in authority. That’s why you and I must not fight back stabbers. Just ignore them and face your work. They can’t do us jack!
What have I said today?
You are most likely to encounter back stabbers at work. You don’t have to fight but find a way of coping with them. First ignore them; knowing that they can’t affect your promotion. Second, realize that the person is back stabber and treat him as one in your saying things personal about you before him.
Go and fly high in your workplace!